-I told an entire room of (mostly) queers tonight that I sleep with "bio" men. I haven't really talked about being in the closet to my queer community about the guy thing, but I have been. And tonight I decided to start 2007 off right by trying to just be myself and let the chips fall where they may. Obviously there was no collective gasp or mass fainting spell, but it'll be interesting to see what the gossip mill in our very small, insular community does with the news. I'm trying not to care, but falling short. Still, it felt powerful and I'm glad I did it.
-I wound up with the perfect opportunity to invite The Puppy along to a social plan that's developing tomorrow night with some mutual friends and discovered that I really didn't want to anymore! Not that I wouldn't be psyched if he came on his own (if someone else invited him) or if he texted me or otherwise showed some kind of initiative. Because I'm pretty sure I would. But I've finally crossed over into Can't Try Anymore territory, and it is a sweet, sweet relief.
-In (possibly related?) other other news, two friends have already offered to set me up with two different guys this year! And it's only the 2nd. Looks like the pool may be expanding after all, but I'm not going to count my dates until they DATE ME (I'm looking at you, The Charmer, who still hasn't called two days later...).
Wednesday, January 03, 2007
In Other News
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2 comments:
Found your blog recently (as in, today) and have enjoyed reading it. In general just fascinated with reading about anyone's adventures in finding selfdom and partnerdom and all that good stuff.
I've been playing the internet dating game a little bit lately, before that was basically serially monogamous and so only now can I relate to various aspects of the uncertain stages of meeting and getting close to people. Like you I recently crossed over into a 'can't try anymore' with someone and oh my GOD what a relief it is. Actually, I do kind of miss the palpitations and panic I could put myself into when I was so super crushed and the good signs would make me squeal but it's just so much easier to concentrate, on all sorts of things, when you're not so focused on the waiting game. Waiting game goes bye, and you can appreciate things going any which way. Fun!
I'll be reading from here on out. :)
Just wanted to let you know that I’m greatly enjoying your blog. I’ve been in similar situations myself and relate to a lot of what you’ve been writing. I’m also editing an anthology called Coming Out of the Closet Again: Queer Women on Loving Men for Suspect Thoughts Press. It’s a collection of personal essays by queer and lesbian –identified bisexual women. I’d love it if you would like to contribute something. You can reach me at Cheryl at cherylb. com and I can give you more info. I also have a blog http://theblist.blogspot.com.
Happy New Year.
Cheryl B.
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